Untitled aka the Woes of Wolfram
by iNsAnE nO bAkA
Summary: Wolfram finds out that due to a very longstanding agreement made between the von Bielefelds and the Shibuyas that he is now the proud and fiercely unhappy fiancé of one Demon King. Understand? The very unhappy fiancé. Warnings: very A.U. and....a sulky, a
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: Kyou Kara Maou and everything that goes with it does NOT belong to me. hides behind the couch and sulks**

**Title: Untitled (aka the Woes of Wolfram)**

**Rating: PG-13-ish**

**Pairings: duh...Yuuri/Wolfram**

**Summary: Wolfram finds out that due to a very long-standing agreement made between the von Bielefelds and the Shibuyas that he is now the proud (and fiercely unhappy) fiancé of one Demon King. Understand? The very unhappy fiancé. **

**Genre: a teeny-tiny bit of romance (practically nonexistent), a bit of comedy, and a lot of AU-ness**

**AN/Warnings: First time foraying into KKM territory. I hope I stayed in character...Completely AU, use of OCs (don't worry, there shouldn't be any Sues), and unbetaed...sorry!**

It was a beautiful day is the territory of the Bielefleds. The sun was shining, the birds were chirping happily, and everything was calm and peaceful. A pity that it wouldn't last too long...

"WHAT! WHAT DO YOU MEAN I'M ENGAGED!" came the enraged bellow from the shimmering palace. Everyone about ten miles around cowered in fear. They all knew about the Mazoku prince's temper and were terrified that it would be unleashed upon them. The townspeople remembered the time where he threw a tantrum about not getting a dog...the effects of that were still visible to everyone. Blackened rooms and destroyed furniture were the least of their worries. No, they had to deal with scorched farmlands and steaming hot streams.

"Calm down Wolf dear!" his grandmother, Clarimonde von Bielefeld, said with a touch of nervousness in her voice. She did not want a repeat of the events that happened several years ago. Wolfram paced, completely and utterly furious about what happened.

"Calm down? Calm DOWN! How, by all that is Holy, can I CALM DOWN! You just told me that I'm to be married! To a philandering, cheater of a fiancé! Everyone knows that the Heika is nothing but a womanizer! And you want me to marry him!" he demanded, voice rising increasingly. Anger coursed through his body, as well as fear. After the incident with Jaegar, an ex-lover, cheating on him, Wolfram did not trust anyone to stay faithful to him. It was one of his worst nightmares; to be trapped in a marriage where his husband had several mistresses on the side would be unbearable.

"Those are just rumors Wolfram. This is for the honor of our family. After Shibuya Shoma saved your father's life, an agreement was made to unite the families together. You and Luana are the only children of the von Bielefelds. With Luana engaged to Damien von Karbelnikoff, you are the only one left. You should be honored to become the consort of the Great Maou." Clarimonde scolded. Wolfram glared, knowing that it is a high honor but hating it all the same. "What's done is done, Wolf dear. You are to be taken to Shin Makoku tomorrow before dawn so go and pack. Now."

Wolfram stared, rather stunned as his grandmother left the room. He was to leave the Bielefeld territory tomorrow at dawn! He couldn't help but panic slightly at the thought of leaving his home so soon. Of course, he did rather understand why he was leaving so quickly. After all, they didn't want him to devise a plan to run away or somehow sabotage the engagement. He turned and surveyed his room, dread at the thought of tomorrow morning filling his mind.

* * *

_Dawn, the next morning, in the Bielefeld territory:_

"No! Nonononononono! I refuse! I absolutely refuse!" came the yell. Wolfram, again, was clearly NOT happy. He had been informed about what exactly he will be wearing on his voyage to Shin Makoku. Wolfram held up the gorgeous pink, lacy, billowing gown and shook it angrily. "I am a soldier! A blasted good soldier, might I add! I'd rather be coated with sugar and given to the sandbears than wear this, this monstrosity!" Clarimonde just sighed, wearily. She didn't quite understand why he was so upset. After all, he slept in that silly pink nightgown so why the fuss now?

"Just what's wrong with it Wolfram?" she asked, as patiently as possible. Wolfram practically snarled at her, thoughts of murder in his mind. First, they were forcing him with this engagement and now they were trying to get him to wear that thing?

"It's frilly and huge. I'll look like an oversized cream puff in that. Just what's wrong with my usual uniform?" he asked, mutinously. Wolfram had been planning to wear his blue uniform to show the so-called Heika that he would not be some kind of a simpering, fluff brained idiot. That he was a soldier, not a meek and mild lordling who could be pushed around. Wearing _that_ wouldn't give the King that impression.

"Because Wolf dear, the uniform is too military. You are to be meeting your fiancé! Not a soldier meeting his King! And you would look lovely in that, I would think," she said, as cheerfully as possible.

"No means no, grandmother. I will not wear it!" said Wolfram, stubbornly. He crossed his arms and raised his nose in the air. He will not wear it and they can't make him!

* * *

"Goodbye Wolf dear!" Clarimonde said, a bit teary eyed. "I can't wait for the ceremony! Do behave!" She waved her handkerchief in the air. Her little Wolfram was all grown up, getting married to the King! How delightful! However, Wolfram just sat in the carriage, sulking like crazy in the pink gown. He didn't know how his grandmother did it, but somehow, he was wearing it. In his eyes, he thought he looked quite horrible in it. In others' eyes, it was quite different. The soldiers that had been sent to escort Wolfram safely to Shin Makoku stared at the vision before their eyes and were quite envious of the lucky King. Yet, they weren't envious of the battles the Heika will have to go through to make his new bride happy.

"That there's a wildcat, mind you." One of the battle worn soldiers whispered to his comrades. "Teh king's a lucky fellow to have such a one as that young 'un but one wrong move," he made a slicing movement across his throat. "an' he'll have to post teh guards to protect him from his bride. Not even I would make that boy mad. I 'eard he has teh temper of ten sandbears! Wouldn't want ta be teh focus of all that anger, unless o' course it was in teh bedroom!" The others laughed, completely agreeing with the old soldier. Wolfram didn't hear them since he was pouting about the completely unfairness about his situation but if he did, there would have been blood--lots of blood.

"Time to pull out!" bellowed the Captain, motioning everyone to get a move on. "With luck, we'll be able to reach Shin Makoku by nightfall!" Wolfram just snarled at the thought. 'Ha! With luck, the city of Shin Makoku will be swallowed up by the earth before I get there!' he muttered mutinously in his mind. He felt the carriage lurch and start to move forward.

* * *

Wolfram was angry. He was beyond angry. He was about to stab someone with his sword, that's how angry he was. Of course, why wouldn't he be angry? After all, he was being forced to marry a philandering Maou and he was wearing that hideous cream puff dress. So why wouldn't he be so furious? Luckily, for the soldiers with him, a form of distraction showed up dressed in bandits' outfits.

"Well lookit what we have here," came the leering drawl from the side of the road. Wolfram peeked out from behind the curtains, wondering what was going on. "Ya know what I heard? I heard that the Maou's pretty princess is heading this way. I wonder if that's true."

Pretty princess! Do they not know who he was! He'll turn them into mincemeat! Wolfram snarled wordlessly at the foolish bandits. Then paled at the thought that _everyone_ knew about the engagement. Did they truly believe that he was some sort of helpless damsel in distress? He furrowed his brow in thought. "Well then," he thought. "I'll just have to fix these rumors won't I?" He calmly stepped out of the carriage and turned to face the bandits.

"Who wants to know?" Wolfram asked coolly. He smirked at the bandits but started to frown when they stared at him gobsmacked. "Stop staring at me! I know I look like an oversized cream puff!" he yelled. He didn't quite like the glint in their eyes, mistaking it for derision. "All the elementals that..." he started to chant before he was cut off by another.

"What's going on here?" a pleasant voice asked calmly from the road. Everyone turned their heads to see a rather handsome man with chocolaty brown hair and eyes. Wolfram bristled. How dare whoever he was interrupt him! He'll blast him with his fire magic as well!

"Ne Conrad, I think we came upon some bandits upsetting the lovely lady," a young man with brown hair and blue eyes said, scratching his head awkwardly. At this, Wolfram just blew up.

"Lovely lady! Gah! I'll show you lovely lady!" he yelled, highly aggravated. "Take this! And this! And I'll just shove this up--" as fireballs were suddenly rained down upon them all. "I have never been more insulted in my entire life! Pretty princess! Lovely lady! I'm a boy for the love of Shin Makoku! You...you...idiots! You blind fools!" Wolfram raged, absolutely livid. The guardsmen stared, rather stunned at the sight of the bandits and the two newcomers dancing about trying to avoid the fireballs. They weren't sure if they were brave enough to stop the angry blonde, not if it meant dodging those fireballs. One of the soldiers finally noticed who the brown haired man and his companion was and turned pale.

"Heika! Kyo Weller! Lord von Bielefeld, that's the King you're attacking!" he yelped, frantically trying to get the irate blonde to stop. Everyone screeched to a stop when they heard the words.

"Eh! The King!" they chorused, bewildered. The brown haired, blue-eyed young man laughed weakly and waved hello.

"Ah, hello?" Yuuri said, smiling unsurely. He didn't seem to know what to do. "Why don't we all calm down and talk about this? Violence doesn't really solve anything." He stared at the bandits and at Wolfram hopefully.

Wolfram twitched. This was the great Maou! "Hennachoko!" Heads whipped around to stare at the blonde as he yelled. "Wimp! How in the name of Shinou can I be marrying a wimp like you!" At this, Yuuri choked, completely and utterly surprised.

"You're my fiancé?" he gasped. "But you're a _boy_!" Seconds later, there was a passed out Yuuri with an disgruntled Wolfram choking him, yelling about how he won't stand for cheaters and wimps and that yes, he is Yuuri's fiancé and to get used to it because they are going to get married and there's nothing Yuuri can say or do to change it!

The End...I guess...

Please R&R...I'd appreciate it...puppydog eyes...


	2. Chapter 2

AN: I would like to say a quick thank you to everyone who reviewed and encouraged me to write more. I'm still not sure where this is going, but I'll give it a try! Thanks to luz, Cimmerian Sorceress, Craze Izumi, DreadtheCrimson, Sora-Morikawa, Gwynhafra, Tk, piggybank1, Kyoua, Flame-chan, Blueraingurl, and ChaosOfTheUniverce!!!! You all rock!!

AN2: Still a lot of AU-ness. A bit sad this chapter. Please R&R!!!!!

Disclaimer: I do not own KKM…..or I would have Yuuri and Wolfram married so fast, it'd be like……. magic….ooooh, ahhhhh….

* * *

Chapter 2 

After the bandits ran away, rather than face the fury of the irate fire demon, the bedraggled group finally made their way into Shin Makoku. Wolfram was still enraged at the thought of being rebuffed--rebuffed! Him, the gorgeous, fire demon extraordinaire, not to mention brave, and skilled warrior that he is, rebuffed! Outrageous! Unthinkable!--and glared darkly at the nervous Maou. Yuuri just could not believe that this unpredictable, though very pretty, _male_ fire demon was his long awaited fiancé. He had been expecting a beautiful, demure princess! Not a wild, bold prince! Especially a prince who looked a lot like a girl in that pink dress.

"Ah…." he said, rather weakly. "Are you sure _you're_ my fiancé?" He watched, wide-eyed, as Wolfram swelled with anger.

"For the last time hennachoko! I. Am. Your. Fiancé!" he gritted, angrily. "So. Stop. Asking. If. I. Am. Or. Not! Or. Else!" His hand twitched, as if sensing the need for a fireball. Yuuri eyed him warily, feeling that the "or else" will be quite painful, and decided to drop the whole issue until he was safely behind the walls of the castle and around many, many eyewitnesses.

The soldiers couldn't help but be amused about the whole spectacle. But there was no way anyone would laugh, fearing that the fiery blonde would take it the wrong way and blow up (or them) again. The Captain was quite glad that they had reached Shin Makoku, feeling as if he had barely survived walking into a sandbear's nest. As the group quietly made their way to the castle, they heard a loud screech and a figure came flying out from the castle doors.

"HEIKA!!!!! OH HEIKA! YOU'VE COME BACK!!!!!!!!!" came the loud wail. No one even paid any attention to the sight of a something screaming and tackling the poor Maou. Wolfram, on the other hand, twitched as he watched a lavender haired man glomp onto the Maou and wail about how glad he was that the Maou came back to him.

"Gunter, please." said Conrad, amused. "You're crushing the Maou." He walked over to pry the clingy advisor from the Maou but was stopped when he felt a murderous aura emanate from the area. In fact, all the soldiers stopped what they were doing when they felt it.

"YuuuuuuRRIIIIIIIII!" came the bellow. Cue the cringing. "How DARE you CHEAT on me! I have been your fiancé for LESS than a DAY and I see you consorting with another MAN! And in FRONT of me! You are MY fiancé and I will not have you publicly CAVORTING with someone else! Do you HEAR me?!" Wolfram had had it. He didn't want to be stuck in this engagement in the first place and after accepting it, his fiancé was practically engaging in relations with someone else! And in front of him to boot! All of his insecurities flew up, and he, as normal, turned it into anger.

"First of all," Yuuri began. "I am not cheating on you. Second of all, it's impossible that you're my fiancé because, well, because you are a boy. So I can't marry you. We'll get this misunderstanding fixed up and then we'll all be happy. I know I have to marry one with Bielefeld blood, but I'm sure you have a sister or a cousin. I'll marry a nice pretty girl and you will probably be happy courting someone else too." The poor, oblivious Maou did not realize the danger that he had just placed himself in. While he had been talking, Wolfram just stood there, head bowed, feeling rejected, humiliated, and enraged. The wimp won't marry him because he's a boy?! Words could not describe his fury.

"Is that so." He said, silkily. He raised his head and Yuuri couldn't help but shiver at the look in Wolfram's eyes. "Let me make this clear to you. First of all, whether you like it or not, I am your fiancé. I do have a cousin but she is engaged to Damien von Karbelnikoff. Their wedding is in a week. I have no more female relatives. The issue of me being a boy has nothing to do with this engagement because the contract between our families was signed and sealed. There is no way to break the contract. Do you hear me? Even if there was a way to break the agreement, there is no way I would allow it. I will not have you make a mockery of me and my family. You will marry me and you will at least appear happy doing so, or I will make your life miserable." Wolfram could barely hold the tears back. He couldn't believe that the great Maou was such a wimp, a cheater, and a, a, jerk! He blinked back tears and haughtily swept past the gobsmacked Maou and walked through the castle doors. He would make this engagement work, because to be rejected like that, and in public!, was beyond humiliating. He turned around, looked at the shocked Maou and the clingy advisor, and smirked. "Before I forget, FIREBALL!"

KABOOM! All Yuuri could do was cough weakly, since Gunter had been knocked out, and stare despairingly at Conrad, who, curiously, had a hard gleam in his eyes. "What have I got into now?" he asked, morosely.

* * *

Next time on Untitled aka Woes of Wolfram! See the reactions of Gwendel, Cheri, and the rest! As well as some...revelations... 


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